Perfectionism isn't cute
Perfectionism isn't cute
You are not even perfectly imperfect
“Perfectionism is the voice of the oppressor, the enemy of the people.”
–Anne Lamott
"What's your greatest weakness?" is an insipid question. "I'm a perfectionist" is an egregious answer. The occasional pang of perfectionism is OK; it's unforgivable to choose it as a badge. So in case there was any confusion about it, perfectionism isn't cute. Reject this label and all that comes with it.
Enrolling in perfectionism is tempting because you get to admit to a flaw coated in a thin candy shell. But identifying as a perfectionist isn't self-deprecating. You are elevating yourself as an agent of perfection. You have declared "nothing is good enough for me," and punctuated it with a hairflip.
It's like adding "I'm a wee bit narcissistic" or "I've got a touch of prejudice" to your dating profile. Perfectionism isn’t a personality: it’s destructive, addictive, and oppressive. When you call yourself a perfectionist you are saying:
I believe I am exempt from failure
I believe I deserve competence without training
I believe the friction of making shouldn't apply to me
I believe I am exempt from judgment (except my own hot puddle of self-judgment)
I believe it's better to do nothing than to have attempted at all
I'm here to tell you, with love, that you are not perfect. You will never be perfect. You are not even “perfectly” imperfect. Perfect is not a thing.
Live the life of an imperfectionist instead: your first ideas will suck, so murder your first born ideas. You will probably wander the forest; trust that the waste is what works. You think your job is to produce genius, but that’s a delusion: just make it edible. You will proceed with doubt, but you are not your thoughts.
Perfectionism isn't cute. Don't pretend you want to be perfect, especially not out loud. If you ask me, you're better than perfect, because perfect isn't a thing anyone wants to be. Perfect is destroyed when it is touched, which means perfect cannot be loved.